New Beginnings?

Sometimes its so easy to articulate what you think or feel. You know the exact words to convey your thoughts. 

At other times, you have a jumble of thoughts in your head and its really quite chaotic, but you are at a loss for words. These thoughts then keep piling up and you go back and forth and back and forth until your head aches. 

What do you do in such a situation? 

This is a genuine question. I am definitely not giving an answer to it through this post. If anything, I am seeking one.

I believe that writing really helps put my thoughts together. But I don’t really feel inspired to write anymore. My last post for this blog was more than a year ago, and I have not found the motivation or the inspiration to write in all that time. I have so many things I can actually write about, thoughts that I could (should) put into words, but sometimes I feel that I just cannot muster up the energy to do so. So much has happened in all this time–only a year, although it seems far longer. 

Honestly, at times, writing about something that happened during this time almost seems like reliving it. That is one thing I cannot do. I don’t want to relive most of my past year; it really hasn’t been good. 

Rather, I would like to think and ponder over my future. Again, so many things to think about. I am actually quite excited about it, although I don’t want to be. Atleast not unless I know I will be able to do what I have in mind. I have learnt that planning too ahead of yourself is not always a good idea. Life has a way of reminding you that you cannot always control everything. It surprises you and makes you realise the value of what you have. 

For a time, I think I was afraid to even think about what I could do, even to dream. I still am. But I think if I can just be determined and strong enough, like my mom was, then I could do it. I just need that confidence back. I don’t think I’ve had that for some time now. 

But maybe this could be the start of something new…

PS. I thought this blog was as good as dead. But I have realised that that’s really up to me. So I think its definitely worth another shot. For myself atleast. I am going to try writing again. Maybe sporadically, but any writing right now is a good enough start. I guess we’ll see how it goes.

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5 thoughts on “New Beginnings?

  1. Daksha says:

    Welcome back !!
    You’re right its pointless to plan the future..cz its our control(&its a “moo”point) But it is also full of surprises(not to be afraid of). And i think reality many a times turns out to be better than our imagination.
    We cant plan our entire life ahead but short term present goals are smthing we set for ourselves.Its these small steps that count in the end.
    And you dont hv to write about your experiences in the past. You hv so much more to write about, and I see that creativity and imagination in your writing.
    How about challenging yourslf to write on it.!
    Il always look forward.

  2. I genuinely believe that writing will help you figure out at least some of the stuff.. And I know it’s difficult but keep trying, but remember that it is okay if you don’t always and up doing things that you have planned.. All of this sounds very clichéd but sometimes it is helpful to remember these things

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